There's a new restaurant in my neighborhood. It's what I used to call "fancy" when I was a youngster: well decorated with good food served in an attractive way (I think that's now called "presentation"). With these characteristics it's become instantly successful., When I was lucky enough to get on the reservations list I realized how important "eating out" has become to our culture. Good conversation in good company accompanied by good food is one of the great pleasures in a life in these difficult times.

As I pondered the menu I was reminded of a health letter I received this week that emphasized, once again, that if we don't do something about our diet and exercise we're destined to become fat and, because we are living longer, suffer the consequences as we age. The article suggested one of the problems for those of us who love restaurant experiences is that in recent years plates and the portions on them have gotten bigger. In many cases you get enough food to feed two people. (Ever seen a pasta bowl at Olive Garden?) Although this wasn't the case at Tucci's (there's my plug) I discovered I'd found the topic for my newsletter this week: Guidelines for eating out without feeling deprived.

• 1. If it's been a long time since you last ate, have a small snack before you leave home to take the edge off your hunger and make a high-fat appetizer less appetizing.

• 2. If you are going to have a cocktail, drink some water first. It will temper any effects of the alcohol and fill your stomach. A slightly full feeling can be a reminder to eat until your full, then stop.
• 3. Skip the appetizer. Unless you are having crudites (veggie sticks) without a dip, you can count on these pre-meal snacks to be high in calories and, in many cases, the size of a regular meal.
• 4. Read the menu with an eye for clues to how food is prepared. If, for example, the sauce is described as creamy, you can wager it is filled with cream and butter. If you don't know what a sauce is, ask the waiter.
• 5. Consider ordering a child's portion of an entrée or a couple of side portions or an appetizer or soup and a salad instead of a main course. Chances are you will get plenty of food.
• 6. Ask for a take-home box when your food arrives then put half the serving n the box and set it aside. if you don't want to take food home, eat half your meal then put your napkin on your plate. (My friend Carla puts salt all over the foods she doesn't want to eat.)
• 7. Focus on the company, not the food. People who spend more time talking spend less time eating. Avoid conversations that are stressful. I've learned that few minds are changed when it comes to opinions. I have friends who have a very different perspective on a variety of subjects and we have agreed not to talk about them over a meal.
• 8. If you are determined to splurge on your meal and a dessert, eat lightly throughout the day. You can also cut back on calories the day before and day after your big meal. However, don't "fast." It's not good for your metabolism which thinks, "starvation has set in; time to start storing calories."
• 9. Add a walk to your meal. Extending your experience with some light exercise will send you home with a feeling you've kept things in balance.
• 10. Don't waste any time after the meal beating yourself up for what you did or didn't eat or did or didn't say. The past is history and is good only for memories. Use it as a springboard to the present and a future of the best health you can be.